featherxquill

Title: Blindness and Stars
Rating: NC-17
Word Count: 11,000
Pairing: Rita Skeeter/Amelia Bones
Summary: In the months following Voldemort’s first defeat, two women with similarly ambitious natures but very different ethics cross paths often enough that they decide to try walking together.
Warnings: Ministry politics? Abnormally large Hufflepuff population?
Author's Notes: Thanks to my fabulous beta, Katie! Written for Mcgonagallsgirl as part of the hoggywartyxmas exchange.

( Blindness and Stars )

So tonight I updated my fic masterlist - expanded the 'fanfic100 prompt table link' because it meant nothing was visible, and also, wtf, there is no way I am ever going to finish that. 100 fics sounds easy until you actually start writing them. This was possibly me being productive, but also possibly me procrastinating the story I'm trying to write right now. Dear fic, this was meant to be an easy little thing to keep my brain amused so it didn't start writing my minerva_fest fic three months in advance and then go insane waiting for posting to happen. You have no business being so lazy and hard. Please get easier, because you are so far possibly awesome, even though you are only, like, 2 pages, and the second half of the pairing is off somewhere trying on satin blouses or something and hasn't even shown up yet. I am determined to make you work, so please Get On With It, because I would like to start aforementioned fest fic in early July, since I forsee it growing a mind of its own and being epic. Kthx, Me.

Anyway, yes. So AFTER messing around with my fic list, I went and updated the Rita Skeeter Masterlist, which was desperately in need of it. I reorganised it a little, too. Gen is at the top, then humour/crack, pairing in alphabetical order of character where there are at least two stories, Other Pairings, Art, and then dead links sitting all sad at the bottom.

I think I got everything? I am uncertain, because there were a few months there where I failed to read my flist, like, at all, but people do tend to poke me in the direction of Rita fics when they're posted. Still, if you know of anything that I've left off, please let me know? Also, if there are any more dead links I didn't catch, or invisible b0rked coding? Or if you know of somewhere I can find any of the listed dead links? (FYI, I think - I HOPE - FictionAlley is just down. It's coming back, right?)

Conclusions I have come to from updating the list. The world needs Rita/Xeno, more Rita/Bellatrix (either fem or fucked up schoolgirl friendship, or both), more Rita/Minerva because they are AWESOME, more Rita/Rufus for the same reason, and also I have written so many weird and wonderful pairings.

Bring on the DH promo pics! I hope there'll be a Rita Renaissance!

Title: Beetle Dreams
Pairing Luna Lovegood/Rita Skeeter
Rating: R
Summary: In the summer after her seventh year, Luna is bereft and uncertain about her future. She spends her days in the sun by the creek, reading or looking at the clouds. One afternoon she finds a strange beetle there and takes it home with her, then at night she is visited by a dream woman in beetle-green satin.
Author's Notes: Written for Ali. Hope you like it, hon! Fanfic100 prompt #63: Summer. Thanks to an_fhanai for being such an awesome beta ♥. Luna may or may not be eighteen in this fic, but she is of legal age in her universe, and contextually a consenting adult.

( The dream woman sits in the chair and watches watches watches, and Luna knows it definitely isn’t Mum because the woman’s gaze makes her twist and turn under the sheets and slip her hand beneath the waistband of her knickers )

I can't believe that even years after the film, and when I think I have search the intarwebs so thoroughly, that there can still be Rita pictures I've not seen before.

But there are. And they make me go ljgkasgdhgfdgfdjhfdJHGFD.

( The first one is the best and I think I shall have to make an icon of it )

Three Rita fics written the last month! This makes Angie a bouncy little fangirl. They're all awesome, and you should run and read them.

Publishable News | Gen | PG | by inkvoices

A fun, humorous piece. I love the snarky Rita headvoice.


Onychophilia | Rita/Cedric | NC-17 | by ldymusyc

ahdsgshsgjs;jkl. This fic is amazing. Cedric has fingernail fetish, and it's HOT, and REAL, and the characterisation and sexual tension is just amazing. ldymusyc seems to have reached into my brain and picked out everything I love in a Rita characterisation and put it into a fic.


Everything Old is New Again | Rita/Gilderoy | NC-17 | Anonymous

This fic is hilarious, and narcissistic as only this pairing could be, hot, and altogether surprising and wonderful. Go read it now.

Go forth and read!

Title: Glass
Pairing: Lucius Malfoy/Rita Skeeter
Rating: R
Warnings: Character death, stalking, voyeurism
Summary: Your wife's dead, Malfoy. The Dementors steal his memories of Narcissa's smile, and when they come back she is changed, with curled hair and scarlet nails and a green quill. If you're not crazy before you go to Azkaban, you come out that way.

Notes: Written for the Lucius FQF prompt: After the death of his wife, Lucius wants revenge and he doesn't care who he extracts it from. I tend to interpret prompts rather broadly. Also for FF100 promt: Colourless. Thanks to celtmama for the beta.

( her face is strange, like he’s looking at her through glass etched with one picture and there’s another underneath that he can’t see clearly )

Title: She Smirks In Scarlet
Pairing: Rita/Severus (with a tiny moment of implied Rita/Pansy)
Rating: Light R
Summary: He knows there’s only one way to master this creature in his grip. Give her what she wants
Notes: Written for snape_rarepairs pairing of the month, and the challenge 'power'. Also for the fanfic100 prompt 'She'.


( she’s not afraid of him at all and it makes him want to break her )

Title: Twist
Pairing: Rita Skeeter/Vicky Frobisher (post-Hogwarts)
Rating: NC-17
Warnings: D/s, spanking
Summary: Vicky Frobisher doesn't like women. No, not at all.

A/N: Written for millieweasley and inspired by this rp at the_leaky. Obviously, Millie's version of Vicky was what made this fic happen, but the liberties I've taken with the character and her actions are purely my own :). Also for the ff100 prompt 'Touch' and legomymalfoy's Cunnilingus challenge. Stole the title from Goldfrapp. Thanks to wishing_wounds for the beta.

( Fight me, try me, kiss me like you like me, twist it around again and again )

Title: The Difference
Pairing: Rita Skeeter/Poppy Pomfrey
Rating: PG
Summary: For all you know, this could be the difference between what you are and what you want to be.
A/N: This is a very, very belated Christmas er... Chinese New Year (heh) gift for fey_spirit. I'm sorry it took so long, but I hope you enjoy it, Fey. The title and summary are Matchbox 20 lyrics. I decided just as I finished the story that they worked very well.

( I was just about to go home. You’ve been in your animagus form too long. )

Title: An Unexpected Understanding
Rating: R
Warnings: HBP Spoilers
Pairing: Rita Skeeter/Minerva McGonagall
Summary: Following the funeral, Minerva agrees to allow Rita to interview her. The result is something neither woman would have expected.
A/N: For the Rita Skeeter Fuh-Q-Fest at ritaskeeter_. Dedicated to ledivinemarquis because she wins at internets, and life, and saucy ideas, and a great many other things ;).

( An acid green quill snapped in her thin fingers. Grief made her ruthless and desperate. )